I need your help. Hold this water balloon while I pee in it.

“If I see a homeless person begging for change, I might give them money, if they…”

“Bestseller doesn’t necessarily mean good writer. I think it takes 10,000 book s…”

“You like vodka, and I like carpet cleaner. You should try it. It’ll put hair on…”

“Things should go where I intend them to go, not where I tend to put them.”