I once got a handjob from a glove. I miss the 80s.

“When I turned 30, I was done with Thousand Island dressing. I have moved on to …”

“There were only two of us left for dinner, and that’s when I realized what I wa…”

“I’m building a building from scratch, and I’m making it out of a giant itch.”

“Some people work in the medical field, others in the legal field, while I work …”