I once tried out for the Girl Scouts. I only went to one meeting. I ate all their cookies and then left.

“A brick could be used to declare war on a country made of glass. I’ll bet those…”

“If we make it out of this alive, I’ll kill you. So you have that to look forwar…”

“I’d love to be a color commentator, but I can’t, because I’m white, and white i…”

“In my closet I have boxes and boxes of secrets. These boxes are all empty, and …”