I put the “Dan” in Danger. I’m sorry, Dan.

“I had a dream about you. You were a lone candle on a barren vanilla cake, and I…”

“The idea of a blind date scares me. But a deaf date would be great.”

“Burn my eyebrows and call me Bette. But if I’ve got eyebrows, don’t call me Bet…”

“I went to school to be a comedian. I was always cracking jokes in class. And af…”