I stole her perfume out of her car, and in its place I left a loud fart.

“I wouldn’t want to work in a nursery, because I can’t deal with children. Or be…”

“A brick could be used to stop a murder. Just wedge it in front of the door of t…”

“I didn’t chug the hairspray because I’m an alcoholic. I drank it to style my th…”

“A part-time worker is fully employed, half the time. In other words, they are p…”