I told her I'd wait forever for her, but that was before I found somebody else who'd give me a ride home.

“My hands fell asleep, so I washed them with hot coffee. Then I had donuts for b…”

“A brick could be a politician, if you attached strings, taught it to dance, and…”

“Used is to sued, as brick is to Kricb, and that is such a profound observation …”

“Sit in a small chair. It’s easier to have people to look up to this way.”