I want to end my life by eating so much Viagra that I go out like that movie and Die Hard. If you want to watch, I just made popcorn.

“Love is a thunderstorm, and I am the desert.”

“I know that man started animal husbandry thousands of years ago, and I think it…”

“I can tie a cherry stem into a knot with my tongue. Now, if only I could do the…”

“Most people wear mind blindfolds. I think that’s stupid. I wear blindfolds over…”