I write down my dreams. I use the excuse “I’m writing” to sleep all the time.

“Me mating with a midget is like a skyscraper having sex with a cathedral. But s…”

“A brick represents my rationality, and a blanket represents my emotions. It’s r…”

“Blood may be thicker than water, but it's certainly not as thick as ketchup. No…”

“I’d rather be snorkeling in the sea of love. But instead I’m stuck here, in a f…”