If I had a funny thought and a runny nose, but only had one napkin and no paper, I’d rather use that napkin to write on than blow my nose. After all, that’s what sleeves are for.

“The locked door in my house is just a diversion. The real valuable items are ou…”

“While I've never read Scientific American, I'll bet it is pretty scientific. An…”

“I hope you don’t mind, but I took the liberty of taking away your freedoms. –Un…”

“I have an electric blanket, but I think it’s criminal to use it any time other …”