If I shake your hand, and then jack off, it’s as if you gave me an indirect handjob.


“A brick could be used to perpetually feed the hungry, stop all wars, educate th…”

“I put the “now” in knowledge. Well, I will put it there, probably tomorrow or t…”

“When people change, I’m disappointed they’re not who I remember them being. And…”

“I need a water/glory mix of 2:1. That’d make me piss like a champion.”