If my name were Nubby Blues, I wouldn't be a jazz musician, I'd be a disabled Vietnam vet on welfare.

“If love were a color, it’d be transparent, like all women’s clothing should be.”

“Toothpaste pie is no substitute for swishing around minty-fresh love in your mo…”

“If I could build my own neighbors, I’d have no need to build a fence. I would t…”

“Make yourself interesting to history. Master some aspect of life, and then find…”