I’ll only blow my nose into green handkerchiefs. Why? Because all my brown hankies are reserved for wiping my ass.

“If I had no penis, how would I pee? How would I make love? How would I think?”

“I want to upholster the inside lining of my nostrils with leather, to have that…”

“The old me is younger than the me now. Ah, but that’s life, no?”

“The institution asked me to speak and say a few words. So, knowing a few is thr…”