I'll show you Obama's birth certificate when you show me Sarah Palin's high school diploma.

“Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex.”

“I wouldn't touch a hot dog unless you put a condom on it! You realize that the …”

“New Rule: Since Glenn Beck is clearly onto us, liberals must launch our plan fo…”

“When opportunity knocks all some people can do is complain about the noise.”