I’m hoping my routine will break me out of my rut. If I keep spinning my wheels, I’m bound to become a bicycling champion.

“I’m tired, and I just want to take a nap. But I want some good sleep, so does a…”

“I'm all about safe fruit. After I peel a banana, I roll on a condom.”

“The wind held the door open for me, and I appreciated it. Who knew the breeze w…”

“The moon is an orbital albino, and it gets tons of sunlight, so I propose Opera…”