I’m into older women, because all women are older women. Every second the woman you love is an older woman.

“I found love in the arms of another woman. Who needs two legs, a torso, or talk…”

“I didn’t chug the hairspray because I’m an alcoholic. I drank it to style my th…”

“I’ve always wanted to make love to a triangle, but I’m always two angles short.…”

“I once got 7th place in a swim meet. Being top 8 is an accomplishment, especial…”