I’m like a tree frog when it comes to birthdays. Basically, my thoughts on birthdays can be summed up in two words: tree and frog.

“The wisest thing my grandpa ever said to me before he died was "Stop!" Thinking…”

“I can’t sell sex for money, but what if I change sex’s name to food? Then can I…”

“Call me paranoid, but the shape the human hand makes when extending out for a h…”

“She’s the kind of woman where if you give her an inch, she’ll take the whole pe…”