I’m not a good liar, and that makes me a good liar, because liars are bad, and bad liars are good.

“I’d be afraid of a man with two shadows, because that man is my clone, and he p…”

“I’ll do anything for money. Anything except work.”

“His breath smelled like a one-inch tall man wearing stinky socks used his tongu…”

“My penis is seven. Not years old or even inches. No, my genitalia is the prime …”