What was I thinking? I thought him sitting across from me would make it easier. Stupid me! Now I have to stare right at the warrior archangel and try to stay focused. I closed my eyes for a minute. Come on, Kells. Focus. Focus. You can do this!
“Okay, Ren, there really is something that we need to discuss.”
“Alright. Go ahead.”
I blew out a breath. “You see, I can’t…reciprocate your feelings. Or your, umm, affections.”
He laughed. “What are you talking about?”
“Well, what I mean is, I-“
He leaned forward and spoke in a low voice, full of meaning. “Kelsey, I know you reciprocate my feelings. Don’t pretend anymore that you don’t have them.”
When did he figure all this out? Maybe when you were kissing him like an idiot, Kells. I’d hoped that I’d fooled him, but he could see right through me. I decided to play dumb and pretend I didn’t know what he was talking about.
I waved my hand in the air. “Okay! Yes! I admit that I’m attracted to you.”
Who wouldn’t be?
“But it won’t work out,” I finished. There, it was out.
Ren looked confused. “Why not?”
“Because I’m too attracted to you.”
“I don’t understand what you’re saying. How can your being attracted to me be a problem? I would think that’s a good thing.”
“For normal people…it is,” I stated.
“So I’m not normal?”
“No. Let me explain it this way. It’s like this…a starving man would gladly eat a radish, right? In fact, a radish would be a feast if that’s all he had. But if he had a buffet in front of him, the radish would never be chosen.”
Ren paused a moment. “I don’t get it. What are you saying?”
“I’m saying…I’m the radish.”
“And what am I? The buffet??”
I tried to explain it further. “No…you’re the man. Now…I don’t really want to be the radish. I mean, who does? But I’m grounded enough to know what I am, and I am not a buffet. I mean, you could be having chocolate eclairs, for heaven’s sake.”
“But not radishes.”
“No.”
“What…” Ren paused thoughtfully, “if I like radishes?”
“You don’t. You don’t know any better.

Auteur: Colleen Houck