Last night the secrets of the universe were revealed to me, and they had nipples.

“I’ll make Chad to you. By that I mean I’ll leave late and come early.”

“The ultimate dead end is murder. My house is on a dead-end street, and it’s kil…”

“If you forget your manners, you can always borrow mine. I won't be using them.”

“A brick could be used to say hello in a foreign language. Like most great words…”