Love is like a rolling rock—with wheels. And legs, too! But no breaks or shoes or anal lubrication.

“No bears were molested in the making of this book. Well, no live bears.”

“I’m a combat specialist and marriage counselor.”

“If you’re thinking about killing someone, don’t. Not don’t kill them, but don’t…”

“A brick could be used to help define your rigid beliefs. I put my beliefs to be…”