Love is tender, like the pot roast I’m keeping warm in my shoes.

“Women are referred to as the fairer sex. But are they really less tan, or are t…”

“One word I’d use to describe space is lonely. The only way I’ll board a space s…”

“-Is he dead?
-Gosh I hope so, because I went to a lot of trouble to dig his gra…”

“A fuel pump is a fountain drink machine for cars. And people who want to save t…”