Masturbation, like writing, is best when your mind is working faster than your hand.

“By brother is so young that to this day he still doesn’t exist.”

“A brick could be used to locate the precise coordinates of the Masons. Just fol…”

“I’d like to file a missing person’s report—on my clone. It’s nearly 2012. He sh…”

“A sand trap is like a politician in its duality. It represents two opposing vie…”