Me and my girlfriend aren’t a good fit. Her clothes are much too small for me.

“Of all the bars in the world, prison is the worst, followed closely by the ones…”

“I have a rough marriage. It feels like sandpaper, only not as soft and gentle o…”

“My banana is decomposing in my pocket. I was happy to see you, but now I’m brow…”

“I’ll steal the letter X, and replace it with treasure. So sex would then be spe…”