My friends call me Two Socks Kintz. They used to call me Barefoot Orafoura, but then someone gave me some socks. That was mighty kind of them.

“The state of North Carolina, Daisy, and John Wayne walked into a bar, and I sho…”

“If facial expressions had fur, then I’d snuggle your sneer. It’s so ugly it’s c…”

“A blanket could be used to keep me from exploding. My patience is wearing thin,…”

“The two spoons were stuck together. Not because they were sticky, but because t…”