My love is like the collision between a falling statue and still bird poop.

“Laws are chains to the many, and whips to the few.”

“The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn’t aro…”

“I want to scrape earwax out of your ears like the last of the chunky peanut but…”

“A brick could be exchanged for a bar of gold. But be sure you wait until the ow…”