My name is Al, but it’s not Al Falfa. You can’t eat me, damnit. At least not legally.

“I am dressed as the loudness of your stereo.”

“There’s truth in what you say, even though it’s all lies.”

“Television isn’t a substitute for a babysitter, but the microwave is. Mmmm cook…”

“If a blanket could be used to keep one person warm, then it stands to reason th…”