My nose is so big it’s like a mountain ridge on my face. Ladies, you could Mt. Everest, or you could mount me instead.

“I’ll throw some dirty clothes under your car and claim you ran over my anorexic…”

“There is a hole in my buttocks. I’d like to return it, or at the very least exc…”

“My mashed potatoes come with a masturbation sound you pour on top, like gravy. …”

“I want to be able to convert sunlight to iron, because your body needs it to li…”