My nostrils smell, but not to you. Oh, they have no odor, unless you count the scent of nostalgia, which is what they always smell like.

“I keep a fish in each pocket, and one in my left shoe, so I don’t drown in your…”

“Wrinkles don’t signify old age, they signify a lack of ironing skills or a dear…”

“Be the cheeseburger you’ve always dreamed you could be. That’s the advice I’d g…”

“There are whiskers in my soup, and my spoon smells like my cat’s ass.”