My rule of thumb for hitchhiking is: stick it up straight and proud and make if visible to all drivers.

“I’d rather ride a unicorn than a unicycle. But my enemies, they could all ride …”

“I left the door open so you could come in—and I could go out. That’s what being…”

“I ran over some dog poop on my drive home last night. But I didn’t feel bad, be…”

“If I were the King’s official mapmaker, I’d also be the second largest landhold…”