On a unicycle, my tire will tire before I do. I ride for charity. I’m trying to raise enough money to buy a bicycle.

“Love is like a buffalo with butterfly wings, and I’m just the humble man in the…”

“I am the dinosaur of love. Specifically, I am a pterodactyl, and you are my sil…”

“It’s amazing how nostalgia filters out the bad and focuses only on the good.”

“I have so much love that it could stretch around the world’s largest dick. But …”