On any job application I ever do, if they want my references, I always list the Bible.

“A kiss involves two people, so I not only have to think about me for me, I have…”

“If somebody’s a jerk and says something nasty, be a bigger jerk and say somethi…”

“Cupid, that chubby cherub love dispenser, is dead. But before he died, he appoi…”

“Of all the things I own, I’m most sentimental about my shoes, because they’ve t…”