One cup contains Starbucks coffee, and one holds diarrhea. But which is which? Drink it, and the one that doesn’t make you vomit is the diarrhea.

“I don't play basketball, but if I did, I wouldn't.”

“The profit was five, split evenly between the two of us, which meant that my fa…”

“A brick could be used to silence your critics. Think of it like a really thick …”

“If you can’t respect me as a banana, then I’m not sure how you can respect me a…”