Pa extended his paw as if to say, “I’m here, and I’m human.” What else could I do but say, “Meow.

“If you can hear me, brush your teeth as a sign and signal. This will let me kno…”

“Why fly in a space ship when you can just park it in my driveway? I’ll even mov…”

“He was a man I came to respect. Not because he wore Ziploc bags for socks (he h…”

“She walked by and I said, Nice shirt. What I really meant was, Nice tits.”