Politicians give criminals a bad name. A bad name like a bad word like shit.

“I wonder if the singer named Seal got his name by using his cheeks as chumming …”

“Reading—it’s the third best thing to do in bed.”

“Maturity doesn’t advance linearly, like you steadily and readily becoming more …”

“After a good run, my legs feel like Jell-O. Somebody get me a spoon and stick a…”