Stoplight red is never greener than when it’s tinged with yellow. I make love like I have no breaks and I’m wearing concrete boots.

“Take pride in your workweek, not your weak work.”

“I have a container full of yelling I keep in my kitchen. It makes a great clean…”

“I would answer the door for the pizza delivery guy wearing my birthday suit, bu…”

“Pa extended his paw as if to say, “I’m here, and I’m human.” What else could I …”