The cop wanted to know what was in the bag. I said, Another cop.

“A blanket could be bunched up and used as a seat cushion. But I’d rather cut of…”

“I prefer kissing over dinner. Not that I prefer kissing to dinner, but I prefer…”

“By day I’m a dishwasher in a suit. By night I’m a dishwasher in pajamas.”

“Which half do you want me to cut in half, Mr. Halfofhalf?
The name’s Onequarter…”