The first guy who beats me up isn’t going to pay for it, but the second guy who tries sure will.

“I make love like I sell sausages to strange women. One at a time, and always co…”

“If I were to show you pictures of my best friends, they’d all be cats.”

“Don’t steal because it’s immoral, not because you’re afraid you’ll get caught.”

“We rode the merry-go-round like a couple of lovers. We weren’t though; we were …”