The internet lied to me?

“My name," I tell Wilbur in the most dignified voice I can find, "Was inspired b…”

“The rest of my Thursday can be summarised thus: - Nat tells me to bite her. - I…”

“Gary nips my finger and starts clawing his way up my shoulder, hissing like an …”

“I didn't need to transform after all.My name is Harriet Manners and I am a geek…”