The last time I went speed dating, I brought a radar gun. I got clocked at over 70 miles per hour.

“A brick could be used to help defeat all incumbent politicians whose last name …”

“My body had some sort of reaction to my erection, and the only thing I could th…”

“I once said, “You put what you get, and you get what you put.” Now I’d like to …”

“Reginald “If” Ifa IV died today. His last words were, “Death, the great What if…”