The prospective buyer said, “Name your price.” So I replied, “OK, how about Ralph Isaac Papov?

“A blanket could be used to fly interdimensionally. My penis is a wormhole.
”

“If my voice sounded like a dial tone, people would probably hang up on me all t…”

“She drew me as a chubby rectangle. But that’s cool, because Chubby Rectangle wa…”

“-My son was 32 when he died.
-Degrees? So he froze to death, huh?”