There were only two of us left for dinner, and that’s when I realized what I was: leftovers.

“After our date, I spent about an hour trying to get in her pants before finally…”

“A brick represents my rationality, and a blanket represents my emotions. It’s r…”

“On the scale of tomato to ketchup, my girlfriend is definitely a 57.”

“I believe two gays have just as much right to marry as one guy has the right to…”