Tickets are 40 bucks at the window, and 190 bucks if you actually go through the window to get them.

“My closet’s so full of memories and fearful homosexuals that I have nowhere to …”

“A brick could be used to help teach teenagers to tie their shoes. Honestly, if …”

“At my bachelor party I had Elton John’s “Tiny Dancer” play on repeat, while I e…”

“Don’t just stand there with your Eiffel Tower smile. Tell me you love me, and t…”