To maximize love, I try to emulate an omelet. And I’m not just saying that to sound romantic.

“My expectations are sky low, because I’m standing on a mountaintop.”

“You are getting a wooden leg for your birthday, and you are going to love it. I…”

“God gave man two ears and one penis hole for a reason. I’m not sure what that r…”

“The fastest way for me to achieve self-improvement is with The Opponent Apparat…”