To some dogs I don’t like cats, to some cats I don’t like dogs, and to some people I don’t like. Mostly the people I don’t like are lawyers, lobbyists, and politicians.

“The problem with ebooks is you can’t get booger smears on the pages.”

“Empty packets of hot sauce remind me of the love I used to have for her. Now al…”

“I have a strong opinion on steroids.”

“Love is 90% what life is about, plus or minus 10%. Of course, I just made both …”