Toothpaste pie is no substitute for swishing around minty-fresh love in your mouth and then rinsing out with cold, refreshing reality. But don’t take my word for it, because I’m not a dentist.

“I ate a rainbow in a bowl, because it’s better than eating rain soup. Food and …”

“The two spoons were stuck together. Not because they were sticky, but because t…”

“The girl of my dreams got married to someone else. But that’s OK. I don’t need …”

“I talked so much about my product that I sold myself. I bought the very thing I…”