What can I say about love that’s never been said by me or anyone else? Well, sometimes love smells like my farts, after I eat a dozen roses.

“A brick could be used to communicate with the dead. I just spoke to Stalin, and…”

“His eyes were so blue, and his teeth so yellow, that the overall impression was…”

“Most people fight with their fists. But I fight with my legs. I fight to stay, …”

“Competition is healthy. Especially when all your competitors are unhealthy, and…”