When I can’t write I read. When I can’t read I sleep. And when I can’t sleep I write.

“Amputate your leg, and attach it to the underside of your wobbly, three-legged …”

“I don’t need a napkin. That’s what pants are for.”

“A brick could be affixed to the collar of my shirt, because I’ve already got th…”

“It’s hot as a watermelon in this cantaloupe called pineapple. And that’s a fact.”