While getting a haircut, I thought about my failed marriage. Instead of feeling bad, I thought I’d grow a beard, move to the mountains, and start over.

“With the interconnectedness of it all, the world is more fluid than ever. I bla…”

“I have two mustaches, one over each eye. They smell like tits and ass, because …”

“She had two leaves for feat. Maple, I think. She was flat-footed and always rea…”

“I make love like the desert. Ever implemented a cactus during foreplay?”