Why fly in a space ship when you can just park it in my driveway? I’ll even move my tricycle to the bathtub, to heighten your showering experience. Who says I’m not romantic?

“The phrase “Rat you out” is offensive because it’s not offensive enough. It sho…”

“Blankets could be used to keep politicians warm, when we kick them all to the s…”

“I’d rather fail to try than try and fail. But, then, I am a coward who votes wi…”

“The doors magically opened without the assistance of modern electronic devices.…”