Yes, ma’am, I will take seconds. Your dinner tastes like excrement. I scream, you scream, we all scream for excrement.

“I could tell we were going to get along from the way he wiped his ass—on my tie.”

“A burial should be more than a fire pit, arena seating, and a squirming politic…”

“Your face influences your life, because it effects how people treat you. Someti…”

“If I were a hermaphrodite, and someone told me to go fuck myself, I'd reply, "W…”